"Just try harder next time."
"Maybe if this boy liked you, you would be beautiful."
"Maybe if you were thinner, then..."
"Why can't you be like that girl over there..."
Maybe if they thought your voice was lovely, you would be..."
"Why can't you get this right, girl?"
"Maybe if you do this, you will be good enough."
Perfectionism
Legalism
Discontentment
Unthankfulness
Bitterness
Selfishness
Pride
Idolatry
Unbelief
The endless song of "never enough"
These are the roots in my heart that I had. Around these roots, I built a large wall and impenetrable fortress of pious "try harder."
And trying harder will never be enough.
The more I tried, the quicker I see and feel that my "trying" is missing the mark, monumentally. And the more I try, the more despair and anxiety I feel. Sometimes it causes me to retreat with great and loud bitterness and self-pity and sometimes to retreat into quiet robotic obedience which has joylessness and resigned despondency dangerously looming under the surface.
Because the illuminating questions that expose the darkness and blackness that lay underneath are:
"Will you love Me and follow Me, even if you never receive what you are begging Me for?
If they never love you,
if I have a life of suffering for you,
if they only draw near when they need someone to listen to their pain and forget you in the fun and carefree times...
will you love and follow Me?
Will I be enough for you?"
And when I faced these questions recently, I was horrified to see that answer was no.
"Kaitlyn, you are too hard on yourself."
"Kaitlyn, look at your worth in Christ!"
"What you want will come if you give it to Him and then, He will give it back..."
These are well-intentioned and even loving efforts to console... except that they keep the focus on me. They feed my self focus and my legalistic "elder brother" mentality of worshiping the Giver in order to receive His gifts.
Because they don't face the truth that He is what we need and that I am idolatrously chasing after other things to fill only what He can fill and heal. It's not even about the healing and filling as much as knowing and glorifying Him. And I'm still so very tempted to believe it.
About a year ago, I was torn in half, grasping at what I wanted and trying to fill my heart with a good thing, but when even the best of things that I pursue are all about me, praise the Lord that they leave me empty, because they aren't about Him. Instead it all left me more broken and torn. And even when walking away, saying, "I can't do this. I can't continue. I need to follow the Lord even if it means I never get what I want. Even if my heart is always broken."
I said those things and I meant them. But, I didn't think that almost a year later, that I would still feel this way. Because deep down, I didn't want to fully surrender them. I thought giving them to the Giver would mean that I would somehow have "earned the right" to get them back. What a divided heart that has revealed.
Because, as the past few weeks have revealed, the idol that I worship is me. It's my emotions and my thoughts and my desires and my perception of the Word.
Oh, what pride.
How ugly.
How divisive.
It puts me directly in us vs. them and most importantly, it takes my focus off of the Savior and puts it on me.
In the middle of June, "Jude" by Psallos was released and I listened to it on repeat for several weeks. What comfort and conviction wrapped up in a beautiful art rock opera of solid truth. Towards the beginning and towards the end of this lovely musical ciasim was the phrase: "we wondered, at times, if God was able to keep us... or would He lose us?"
Yes. I wonder that, too, sometimes.
And in my heart also the questions: "or would I turn away? Would I keep going? Would God be able to keep me even when I don't want to keep going?"
Then, about a month after I started listening to "Jude," I devoured Tim Keller's "The Prodigal God" for the first time. I vaguely remember the story from a video series shown in chapel in high school, but remnants have come back to me as I reread the story for myself.
It was over the weekend in July that we had lost our precious "Mimi," the grandmother and matriarch of our church, Cornerstone. When I joined the Nettles' small group during my freshman year of college at Union in 2011, I met Mimi and saw the Lord's amazing work of holding her fast in the turmoil of much suffering, walking alongside others and persevering hard work. She poured out her life without a complaint. In fact, usually she was playing down whatever she was going through and you could always count on her to call you a "sweet, sweet" and "precious, precious" child of God with great fervor as she exhorted you to hold to the truth of the Word.
The weekend she passed away, my heart was heavy and at a point where some of the desperation was surfacing as I would curl up in bed and sob until I fell asleep. Conviction, as I read "The Prodigal God," cut through this heaviness like an icy splash of water. Some of the groundwork of conviction from "Jude" was being furrowed, and my heart was exposed: I most certainly was the "elder brother" in this parable of two lost sons.
And now, Mimi's life, a stark testimony of a heart transformed and pouring out even when bleeding, because of the "yet not I but for Jesus" grace and mercy that had changed her heart. It wasn't her. It was Christ in her, just as she had always told us!!! Oh, how we miss her!
But, I will never forget: "I just wanna go home to be with Jesus."
That's what she kept saying the last time I saw her and I had no words.
And now, I keep thinking, "Lord, it was You. It was all You. Make me want to see You as much as You made her want to see You. It was Your love. Transform us. Show us. Teach us to love You and Your Word."
Yesterday, I just finished reading, "The Promise is His Presence" by Glenna Marshall. (It may seem as though I keep hopping all over the place, but this does all go together... Thanks for your patience!)
I was part of the launch team for this book, so I have been reading it over the past month and its release was August 1. And it stripped down my facade to its heart and the roots even more. It's a reminder and beautifully shows us that the whole point is that JESUS is the promise! The promise of God that we are trying to figure out and we are all waiting for! That God is WITH us! It's not health, wealth, prosperity, healing, happiness (though, those are not bad things to pray and hope for) but the lack of them doesn't mean that God is not good or that His promises are not true- but rather, He is always with us and purposing all things for our good and His glory the whole time. We can't always know what He is doing but we get to know Him. And He is good and He is enough. And that will be enough.
And that's what I saw in Mimi. What we all saw in Mimi. Throughout her life and at the end of it, she was overflowing with it: the promise is Jesus, and boy, did she rest in that. The gospel is what gave her joy and it's what caused her to press on and pour out. And it wasn't her, it was all Him. And He is still here, even though we miss her, and she is with Him more fully, and we will one day, too.
Praise the Lord.
Because of Jesus.
Those things I listed that were deep in my heart?
They still are.
But, I'm not pretending that they aren't anymore.
And, I pray that the Lord will not let me rest with them remaining there.
Because it's not about me- it's about Him!
"He has promised throughout all of Scripture that He will be with His people. We can trust that, since He has kept that promise for all of history, He will continue to keep it until we see Him face-to-face in Heaven. If death couldn't hold Jesus in the ground, then no circumstance on earth will keep us from the nearness of God. He will never leave or forsake us."
-from "The Promise is His Presence" by Glenna Marshall
As I answered the illuminating questions with a "no," I felt the Lord say back, "I know. That's the point. You can't. Only I can." And, so I am learning to relax into His truth and His will and His presence. Because that's what causes the younger brother to return home and what can cause the elder brother to rejoice at his return! Most glorious of all, it's what causes the Father to welcome them to be with Him. Because we are entering into His rest- and His rest is His Presence. And that is what turns our "why, God?" into "what are You teaching me, God?"
"Mercy and forgiveness must be free and unmerited to the wrongdoer. If the wrongdoer has to do something to merit it, then it isn't mercy, but forgiveness always comes at a cost to the one granting the forgiveness."
- from "The Prodigal God" by Tim Keller
“We wondered at times if God was able to keep us…or would he lose us.”
When dangers creep beneath you,
Like hidden reefs below,
When wandering stars above don’t lead you home,
When people promise blessing,
Like clouds that promise rain—
These pretty lying mists, they wisp in vain—
When wild waves surround you,
With vile, wicked shame,
When trees in which you trusted
Bear no fruit and give no gain.
Can he keep his sheep from stumbling?
Can he keep his children safe?
Can he keep his chosen people free from guilt and blame?
Can he keep his beloved without blemish, spot, or stain?
Now to him, the Lord our God,
He is able to keep you,
Able to keep you.
Our sov’reign King, our mighty Savior,
He is able to keep your soul!
May all glory and majesty,
Dominion and authority
Be yours, forevermore!
Through Jesus Christ, our Lord.
Amen."
-17. the keeper (24-25) from "Jude" by Psallos
Click here to listen to "Jude" by Psallos
Click here to check out "The Prodigal God" by Timothy Keller
Click here to check out "The Promise is His Presence" by Glenna Marshall
Monday, August 5, 2019
Monday, April 1, 2019
Unplanned: Women and children are worth protecting and fighting for
Abortion.
This word brings up so many reactions, emotions and opinions.
It feels like one of those four letter words that make people on edge, uncomfortable, or angry... for different reasons.
Or silent. Because it's just too much, too hard.
Many people are fighting for women's rights and support of women and want them to have the best care possible.
Shouldn't they have the right to decide?
Many people are fighting for the rights of the baby and want to make sure that their voice is able to be heard because they literally cannot speak for themselves.
Shouldn't they have the right to live?
For those who are fighting for justice: it's always important to see ALL of what is happening and then to ask: what can I do to help?
Not what do I think I can do or what do I feel I should do, but really what is needed? What is necessary? What is happening here?
When we put aside what we think the right answer is and look at the facts with an open heart and mind, we are able to see and understand the truth.
When we put aside what we feel that we can or cannot do to help, we are able to enter into the fight when we felt overwhelmed before or enter the fight rightly when we had a personal agenda before.
It is too much to handle.
It is too much to bear.
It is too much to see.
It is too much to hear.
It is too much for her.
It is too much for you. For me.
Why not? Can't we just make it go away?
Sometimes I wish for that, too.
If you are overwhelmed, I understand. It is too much.
I often feel as though my heart can't take anymore.
I was watching Lord of the Rings trilogy in its entirety during a weekend vacation with a friend a couple weeks ago.
And, I was struck by this more than ever before:
They had arguments. Thousands of years of history of racism, anger, hurt and betrayal.
Some of them headstrong and proud, some of the weak and undecided, some of them who had run from the fight, some of them simple and innocent.
They were such a band of misfits who had all failed, been misplaced or were completely inadequate in some way.
And they were so few.
And the darkness and fear was too great.
There was no way that they could win.
But, they joined together. And they fought. Even though they had no reason for hope. No reason to keep going. No way to know if others would join them. No way to know if others had survived. And some of them didn't survive. And some of them didn't have happy and healed endings.
But, they fought anyway.
Together.
And, they won.
And, I cried more than I had ever cried watching those movies.
Because in them, I saw us.
We always have more than we can handle.
We are the misfits: we all have been misplaced, run away, fought each other, been hurt, hurt others, missed the mark, too innocent, had it stripped and so much more. That's part of life. It happens to us and we do it to each other.
What can be done?
We need healing and we need to help others heal.
We need to fight the darkness and spread around the good.
We can't ignore it and hope it will go away.
We can't lighten it up, smooth it over or run away.
We can try to.
But, it won't solve it, heal it, or help it.
It will keep spreading and consume us.
Because it's happening. So we cannot afford to be silent or neutral.
We cannot afford to be angry at each other.
We cannot afford to fight each other.
We must get down to business.
We must have open minds and hearts.
We must remember we are dealing with people.
People with damage and baggage.
With a story to tell.
And even in the most hopeless of situations, there is a reason to hope. There is a reason to live. There is a reason to fight. To choose life. To fight for it.
We must enter into the fight in some capacity or another.
You don't have to be on the front lines. But, you can't be silent.
You can't ignore it and wish it away.
It must be dealt with.
Yes, you are just one person.
This battle isn't on you. You aren't the one carrying the cause. Because we can't fix it. Only the Lord Jesus Christ can. But, He calls us to action- to love good and hate evil. To speak the truth and to love.
One person can speak truth and love- letting the light shine in the darkness. It may not change her mind. It may not change her situation. It may not save the baby. But, she will know that she was loved. And, she will know the truth. And she will be introduced to the Person who IS truth and love- the One who changed our lives.
And He can change everything. He already has.
And, you are NOT alone. There are other people in this fight. And we need you in it, too. We can fight, side by side, for these women and children.
People need to be loved.
She is worth it. Her baby is worth it.
Life is worth it.
Ways that you can enter the fight:
PRAY.
Nothing is more important than your prayers in the fight.
And in that, the Lord will show you further what you can do.
SUPPORT.
- With your finances
Support your local crisis pregnancy center financially.
If you live in the Madison or Gibson county area, click here
If you live somewhere else, click here
- With your time
If you live in the Madison county area, call 731-664-8443.
If you live in the Gibson county area, call 731-855-2900.
Also, if you live in either of these areas, Haywood, Hardeman or Fayette counties, click here for more information on Birth Choice's mobile unit.
You can locate the crisis pregnancy centers in your area here
CONVERSATION.
- Ask questions.
- Talk about it.
- Encourage others to enter the fight. Encourage those who are in the fight. Encourage those who are switching sides.
VOTE.
- Vote for those who will protect life.
- Don't vote for those who are pro-choice.
You can look up online their history of voting for or against the issue of life.
The numbers of lives lost to abortion is staggering. We need to vote for those who will fight to protect life legally. The governmental money feeding abortion financially needs to be stopped. We cannot afford to be neutral in our voting on this issue.
Also, we want those who have had an abortion to know that there is healing and that you can have a safe place to talk about it. Many of the volunteers that I know at the crisis pregnancy center in Jackson, TN have had an abortion in the past or know someone who has.
If you have had an abortion and are looking for healing and you live in the Madison county area, click here
If you don't live in the Madison county area, click here
There is a new movie that has just come out.
It's about this fight that we are in.
It's called Unplanned.
It's about the youngest clinic director of a Planned Parenthood, Abby Johnson, who desired to fight for women and helping them get the health care that they need. She worked for them for 8 years, starting as a volunteer escort, but then, after assisting with an abortion, realized that she needed to fight for the babies, too.
It's never too late.
If you are an abortion worker and are looking for other options, click here
Here is some information that I found as I researched this movie:
Info on the movie- the website for Unplanned, click for website here
Background of making the movie, click here (27:25)
Steven Crowder interviewing Abby Johnson in Jan 2019, click here (42:44)
More info about Abby Johnson, click for website here
Interview of actress, Ashley Bratcher, taking the role of Abby Johnson in the movie, Unplanned, and what it meant to her, click here (4:58)
Testimony of actress, Ashley Bratcher: her story of her unplanned pregnancy, click here (7:19)
Albert Mohler on his discussing a soundbite about the movie as well as how Hollywood has responded to it, click here (enterity approx. 26; section on Unplanned: 11:15)
This word brings up so many reactions, emotions and opinions.
It feels like one of those four letter words that make people on edge, uncomfortable, or angry... for different reasons.
Or silent. Because it's just too much, too hard.
Many people are fighting for women's rights and support of women and want them to have the best care possible.
Shouldn't they have the right to decide?
Many people are fighting for the rights of the baby and want to make sure that their voice is able to be heard because they literally cannot speak for themselves.
Shouldn't they have the right to live?
For those who are fighting for justice: it's always important to see ALL of what is happening and then to ask: what can I do to help?
Not what do I think I can do or what do I feel I should do, but really what is needed? What is necessary? What is happening here?
When we put aside what we think the right answer is and look at the facts with an open heart and mind, we are able to see and understand the truth.
When we put aside what we feel that we can or cannot do to help, we are able to enter into the fight when we felt overwhelmed before or enter the fight rightly when we had a personal agenda before.
It is too much to handle.
It is too much to bear.
It is too much to see.
It is too much to hear.
It is too much for her.
It is too much for you. For me.
Why not? Can't we just make it go away?
Sometimes I wish for that, too.
If you are overwhelmed, I understand. It is too much.
I often feel as though my heart can't take anymore.
I was watching Lord of the Rings trilogy in its entirety during a weekend vacation with a friend a couple weeks ago.
And, I was struck by this more than ever before:
They had arguments. Thousands of years of history of racism, anger, hurt and betrayal.
Some of them headstrong and proud, some of the weak and undecided, some of them who had run from the fight, some of them simple and innocent.
They were such a band of misfits who had all failed, been misplaced or were completely inadequate in some way.
And they were so few.
And the darkness and fear was too great.
There was no way that they could win.
But, they joined together. And they fought. Even though they had no reason for hope. No reason to keep going. No way to know if others would join them. No way to know if others had survived. And some of them didn't survive. And some of them didn't have happy and healed endings.
But, they fought anyway.
Together.
And, they won.
And, I cried more than I had ever cried watching those movies.
Because in them, I saw us.
We always have more than we can handle.
We are the misfits: we all have been misplaced, run away, fought each other, been hurt, hurt others, missed the mark, too innocent, had it stripped and so much more. That's part of life. It happens to us and we do it to each other.
What can be done?
We need healing and we need to help others heal.
We need to fight the darkness and spread around the good.
We can't ignore it and hope it will go away.
We can't lighten it up, smooth it over or run away.
We can try to.
But, it won't solve it, heal it, or help it.
It will keep spreading and consume us.
Because it's happening. So we cannot afford to be silent or neutral.
We cannot afford to be angry at each other.
We cannot afford to fight each other.
We must get down to business.
We must have open minds and hearts.
We must remember we are dealing with people.
People with damage and baggage.
With a story to tell.
And even in the most hopeless of situations, there is a reason to hope. There is a reason to live. There is a reason to fight. To choose life. To fight for it.
We must enter into the fight in some capacity or another.
You don't have to be on the front lines. But, you can't be silent.
You can't ignore it and wish it away.
It must be dealt with.
Yes, you are just one person.
This battle isn't on you. You aren't the one carrying the cause. Because we can't fix it. Only the Lord Jesus Christ can. But, He calls us to action- to love good and hate evil. To speak the truth and to love.
One person can speak truth and love- letting the light shine in the darkness. It may not change her mind. It may not change her situation. It may not save the baby. But, she will know that she was loved. And, she will know the truth. And she will be introduced to the Person who IS truth and love- the One who changed our lives.
And He can change everything. He already has.
And, you are NOT alone. There are other people in this fight. And we need you in it, too. We can fight, side by side, for these women and children.
People need to be loved.
She is worth it. Her baby is worth it.
Life is worth it.
Ways that you can enter the fight:
PRAY.
Nothing is more important than your prayers in the fight.
And in that, the Lord will show you further what you can do.
SUPPORT.
- With your finances
Support your local crisis pregnancy center financially.
If you live in the Madison or Gibson county area, click here
If you live somewhere else, click here
- With your time
If you live in the Madison county area, call 731-664-8443.
If you live in the Gibson county area, call 731-855-2900.
Also, if you live in either of these areas, Haywood, Hardeman or Fayette counties, click here for more information on Birth Choice's mobile unit.
You can locate the crisis pregnancy centers in your area here
CONVERSATION.
- Ask questions.
- Talk about it.
- Encourage others to enter the fight. Encourage those who are in the fight. Encourage those who are switching sides.
VOTE.
- Vote for those who will protect life.
- Don't vote for those who are pro-choice.
You can look up online their history of voting for or against the issue of life.
The numbers of lives lost to abortion is staggering. We need to vote for those who will fight to protect life legally. The governmental money feeding abortion financially needs to be stopped. We cannot afford to be neutral in our voting on this issue.
Also, we want those who have had an abortion to know that there is healing and that you can have a safe place to talk about it. Many of the volunteers that I know at the crisis pregnancy center in Jackson, TN have had an abortion in the past or know someone who has.
If you have had an abortion and are looking for healing and you live in the Madison county area, click here
If you don't live in the Madison county area, click here
There is a new movie that has just come out.
It's about this fight that we are in.
It's called Unplanned.
It's about the youngest clinic director of a Planned Parenthood, Abby Johnson, who desired to fight for women and helping them get the health care that they need. She worked for them for 8 years, starting as a volunteer escort, but then, after assisting with an abortion, realized that she needed to fight for the babies, too.
It's never too late.
If you are an abortion worker and are looking for other options, click here
Here is some information that I found as I researched this movie:
Info on the movie- the website for Unplanned, click for website here
Background of making the movie, click here (27:25)
Steven Crowder interviewing Abby Johnson in Jan 2019, click here (42:44)
More info about Abby Johnson, click for website here
Interview of actress, Ashley Bratcher, taking the role of Abby Johnson in the movie, Unplanned, and what it meant to her, click here (4:58)
Testimony of actress, Ashley Bratcher: her story of her unplanned pregnancy, click here (7:19)
Albert Mohler on his discussing a soundbite about the movie as well as how Hollywood has responded to it, click here (enterity approx. 26; section on Unplanned: 11:15)
Monday, March 18, 2019
The darkness will not overcome the Light
It was all wrong.
This day was bright and crisp, shining with the sun's liquid rays of gold.
And yet, the light seemed unable to break through this woman's heart or her young daughter's heart.
Cold.
I felt as though I was speaking to a boulder.
Solid. Rigid. Unmovable. Unrelenting.
Before the daughter was out of the ultrasound room, the mother was on the phone.
"I want to schedule an abortion."
As, they left, our nurse and client advocate who met with her, spoke the truth and lovingly called after, "we will be in touch. Thank you for coming and for listening."
I could not stop the tears from coming to my eyes.
I could not stop the tears from flowing down my face.
This woman's heart has been so deeply wounded by her own sin and the sins of others that she has taught her daughter the same thing. The hardness was impenetrable.
I almost felt as though I was crying because they could not feel it for themselves. But, then to lift it up. Lift it up to the only One who sees all of this and the parts that I cannot see.
O Lord. Why are our hearts so hard? Why do we continue in our wickedness and refuse to bow before You and see that You are God and that this is a human being? That this daughter's life has already and will be changed forever for murdering her own child's life? Lord. Save us, I plead, from ourselves. May we see the devastation of this. How are our hearts so apathetic to this? How can we stay silent? How can we not cry out? How can we not fight? How can we not share the truth and plead that they know You?
I knew in my heart what they had already determined in their hearts. I knew that we would be unable to break through.
But, You, O Lord, can. Only You.
You are the only One who could break through mine.
You are the only One who can heal anyone's heart.
So we beg for You to open us and heal us and heal those who come. For You to heal this woman and her daughter.
But then I am reminded "that all the dark can't stop the light from getting through" as my church family sang yesterday in together.
From Is He Worthy? by Andrew Peterson
And, I'm reminded of another Rock.
This day was bright and crisp, shining with the sun's liquid rays of gold.
And yet, the light seemed unable to break through this woman's heart or her young daughter's heart.
Cold.
I felt as though I was speaking to a boulder.
Solid. Rigid. Unmovable. Unrelenting.
Before the daughter was out of the ultrasound room, the mother was on the phone.
"I want to schedule an abortion."
As, they left, our nurse and client advocate who met with her, spoke the truth and lovingly called after, "we will be in touch. Thank you for coming and for listening."
I could not stop the tears from coming to my eyes.
I could not stop the tears from flowing down my face.
This woman's heart has been so deeply wounded by her own sin and the sins of others that she has taught her daughter the same thing. The hardness was impenetrable.
I almost felt as though I was crying because they could not feel it for themselves. But, then to lift it up. Lift it up to the only One who sees all of this and the parts that I cannot see.
O Lord. Why are our hearts so hard? Why do we continue in our wickedness and refuse to bow before You and see that You are God and that this is a human being? That this daughter's life has already and will be changed forever for murdering her own child's life? Lord. Save us, I plead, from ourselves. May we see the devastation of this. How are our hearts so apathetic to this? How can we stay silent? How can we not cry out? How can we not fight? How can we not share the truth and plead that they know You?
I knew in my heart what they had already determined in their hearts. I knew that we would be unable to break through.
But, You, O Lord, can. Only You.
You are the only One who could break through mine.
You are the only One who can heal anyone's heart.
So we beg for You to open us and heal us and heal those who come. For You to heal this woman and her daughter.
But then I am reminded "that all the dark can't stop the light from getting through" as my church family sang yesterday in together.
From Is He Worthy? by Andrew Peterson
And, I'm reminded of another Rock.
O Lord, My Rock and my Redeemer
Gracious Savior of my ruined life
My guilt and cross laid on Your shoulders
In my place You suffered, bled and died
You rose, the grave and death are conquered
Gracious Savior of my ruined life
My guilt and cross laid on Your shoulders
In my place You suffered, bled and died
You rose, the grave and death are conquered
You broke my bonds of sin and shame
O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer
May all my days bring glory to Your Name
This cannot make sense and this cannot be helped without You. O Lord, break their bondage and may they KNOW You.
We trust You, Lord and we know that You are good.
Be glorified.
Thursday, April 5, 2018
Why we fight with joy and expectancy
Celebrate?
With something so serious and so heavy, how can we celebrate?
Because, as Dr. Tony Evans reminded us tonight, we are a well-lit location in a dark situation. Our clinic sits there with great expectancy at the Lord's work in how He changes lives and takes the mess of us and makes us miracles.
These girls come in the middle of the apex of their crisis, their mess, their hopeless NO-WAY-OUT...
and they hear the GOSPEL.
They find out they are NOT just a statistic.
They may not be strong enough, but there is ONE who IS and will give them HOPE: joyful expectancy about tomorrow, no matter their situation because now they know Jesus, the lover and life-changer of the WORLD.
Is He Worthy? by Andrew Peterson
There are many tears and many fears: that these girls have, that the fathers of these babies have, that their families have, that WE have! But, how great and wondrous is our GOD!! Crisis in life drives us to a crossroads, and we realize that He has been there the WHOLE time, but suddenly we see the great light in the darkness.
Dr. Tony Evans spoke to this truth: this is why we do what we do. This is why you partner with us in prayer, in encouragement, in gifts, in time, in finances: because it reaches and changes LIVES eternally.
So, as the Getty's sing in their song, O Church Arise: this is our call to war!!! To love the captive soul and rage against the captor, our enemy, Satan! And (my own addition) also, his tools: abortion!
This is a spiritual battle more than anything else!
Because abortion is one of the greatest abominations that there is, not just because of the social ramifications, not even, though horrific and staggering, just because of the murder that it is, but greatest of all because it is a direct attack on God.
How?
Because an attack on the unborn is an attack on the most innocent and defenseless of God's image bearers. It's murder of God's image bearers on the throne of inconvenience. This is violence of the most extreme and ugly of proportions. And the statistics of how many lives are lost are staggering.
So, how can we have hope and how can we have joy in the midst of such horror and such hopelessness, such mess, such struggle?
Not by our efforts, not by our strength, but the hope that we have: Jesus Christ. He loved and saved us. He is here not just to save the physical life of His image-bearers, these babies, but to save the eternal lives of these mamas, changing their lives and their outlook and therefore, changing the life of these babies, eternally.
What about instances of rape, incest and abuse?
I would ask, wouldn't these women need this hope that much more? Jesus Christ is the One who can shine into the darkness of their situations and give them healing, hope and even forgiveness. Protect them and bring the men to justice, but do not advocate for the murder of her child, bringing her even more trauma. I've personally seen the hope that Birth Choice has brought to women in situations of unplanned pregnancy in situations as dire as this.
So, we fight and look forward to tomorrow with expectancy, knowing that Jesus is a life-changer. And that's for eternity.
After the Last Tear Falls by Andrew Peterson
How? Is it worth it?
Even just to save one life, of course it is.
Little Things with Great Love (cover)
So, thank you.
Your prayers, your encouragement, your time, your efforts, they are most certainly not in vain.
This is life-changing work, folks.
And, you are a part of it.
And, I love you for it.
Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.
Psalm 23 (Surely Goodness, Surely Mercy) by Shane and Shane
(These are only a very small few of all the wonderful people that were gathered tonight. It was so encouraging to see so many people who love Jesus, love Birth Choice, the clients and the unborn all together in one room, as our head nurse, Kim Mayer, reminded me before the event began.
What a privilege to gather and be with you all.)
Monday, March 19, 2018
When the Ordinary Starts to Become Extraordinary
Sometimes it's very easy to see what is missing. To feel that ache inside and frantically look for what can fix it. Sometimes it's right in front of us.
The Lord says in His Word, "Be still and KNOW that I am God."
We need to rest. We need to be still. We need to see what is around us. That's when the ordinary becomes extraordinary. The incredible is right in front of us and sometimes we miss it while we are waiting or jumping into the next adventure that catches our eye.
The little buds on the trees, the tiny wildflowers poking their crowns through the rough grass. Hints of soft green coloring what used to be brown. New life. Resurrection. Rebirth.
It's all around us. Yes, there is so much heartache and death. I work there. You do, too. But, there is so much life.
It's when we learn to be still and silent that we begin to see it and hear it. When we stop that we aren't missing out anymore.
I wasn't going to post this song, but I feel like it might bless you as much as it has blessed me.
Do what is in front of you. Enjoy what is in front of you. There's beauty there. Don't miss out on what is here while you are out looking for something else. Do it with love. Do it because Christ is in it. Do it because He loved us first and loves us most.
Monday, March 5, 2018
A Prayer for the Broken
Oh Lord,
What do we do with our one broken heart?
We can only lay it out before You.
Do not let it harden,
or go to sleep,
or wallow.
But, cause us to present it before You, open and ready for Your use,
as humble, messed-up and in need of healing as we are.
Heal us.
Deliver us from evil.
Save us from the evil one.
Seal us with Your Spirit.
It hurts and it will continue to as long as we live, but it will hurt less than if we close it up and let it shrivel and die.
Do not let us.
Do not let us shut it down.
Uproot up the weeds, prune the bad fruit and cut us open to drain the poison. Do not let us die slowly, but heal fully in our souls in Your powerful Spirit who rose Jesus Christ from the dead.
We believe in this Resurrection Power, because it has brought our hearts to life, too.
Thank You.
We love You.
We love You because You loved us first.
Awaken us.
Make us look up.
Fill our eyes with light.
Fill our hearts with peace that passes understanding.
We love you.
We worship.
We praise You.
Thank You for loving us.
The Power of a Great Affection by Andrew Peterson
Philippians 1- our affection for each other and encouragement
Ephesians 3:14-21- prayer for spiritual strength through the power of the Holy Spirit
Revelation 22:1-5- our future hope
What do we do with our one broken heart?
We can only lay it out before You.
Do not let it harden,
or go to sleep,
or wallow.
But, cause us to present it before You, open and ready for Your use,
as humble, messed-up and in need of healing as we are.
Heal us.
Deliver us from evil.
Save us from the evil one.
Seal us with Your Spirit.
It hurts and it will continue to as long as we live, but it will hurt less than if we close it up and let it shrivel and die.
Do not let us.
Do not let us shut it down.
Uproot up the weeds, prune the bad fruit and cut us open to drain the poison. Do not let us die slowly, but heal fully in our souls in Your powerful Spirit who rose Jesus Christ from the dead.
We believe in this Resurrection Power, because it has brought our hearts to life, too.
Thank You.
We love You.
We love You because You loved us first.
Awaken us.
Make us look up.
Fill our eyes with light.
Fill our hearts with peace that passes understanding.
We love you.
We worship.
We praise You.
Thank You for loving us.
The Power of a Great Affection by Andrew Peterson
Philippians 1- our affection for each other and encouragement
Ephesians 3:14-21- prayer for spiritual strength through the power of the Holy Spirit
Revelation 22:1-5- our future hope
Thursday, February 15, 2018
Hope Songs
When It's Coming
Sounds of spring gently grow, fading from the wild winter woes to the thriving thrones,
whispers: "I'm coming...
We will no longer sleep...
We will no longer weep...
The seeds sown will reap, reap the harvest sown in fall.
The winter's snowy blanket helped us grow.
The tiny seeds that He did sow have died and are reborn to grow.
A plentiful harvest is coming.
A plentiful harvest to grow."
The frogs from the bogs gently sing their songs of spring's coming dawn. The doe in her throe over her dear, eases and kindly watches over her fawn, sleeping soundly through the wet winter rain:
"Spring is coming.
"Spring is coming.
We will frolic again,
running like the wind,
leaping through the lawns."
running like the wind,
leaping through the lawns."
She sighs and nestles down, waiting somewhat patiently.
She knows not what tomorrow holds; we will see what unfolds.
She knows not what tomorrow holds; we will see what unfolds.
But, hope is rising with the sun.
Because, even in darkness, love's not done.
Faith grows with the Son.
Light's love
Flickering flame gently falls across my face
and quietly fills up the space,
casting darkness from this place
and the gloomiest thoughts, it will chase.
We will rise in the morn,
though pained right now, with tears and scorn,
though hard-pressed and ever worn,
We will rise in the morn
Light reveals all around
No hidden thing won't be found
Captured up, safe and sound,
Victory drums will pound
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