Incredulity and Pre-Irish Endeavor Jitters

Man, sometimes I can be a little silly... My mom has been asking me all sorts of practical and good questions, but my mentality has been so "chill" that to my ears it sounded a little worrisome. But, as all the little details click into place, (many last second) I realize how wise she has been, and that maybe I was a little too "chill" in my preparation. 
***(NOTE: ALL DAUGHTERS SHOULD LISTEN TO THEIR MOMS BECAUSE THEY ARE OLDER, WISER, AND VERY MUCH AWESOMER THAN WE REALIZE OR GIVE THEM CREDIT FOR. Or at least, MINE is.) ***

But, here I am; everything in place. Everything ready. 
Ready to GO. 
Wait... is this REALLY happening? 

So many thoughts start running through my head... 

"You deserve this. You worked your butt off to make it happen."

"Who are you kidding! You DON'T deserve this at all!" 

Who is to say what we do and don't deserve? 

Sometimes I wonder. 

All I know is that I definitely don't deserve to go to Ireland. Psh no. Nope. Not at all.  

Yet, here I am, in the airport, waiting for my flight to NJ, laying-over to... N. Ireland. WAIT. What... 

No way. 

And, all I can think of, as I am about to do some mission-oriented and relational and discipleship oriented ministry, is how much I don't deserve this and how much I fall short. I think of my sin and my selfishness. 

But, then I am reminded softly, "Kait, do you deserve the grace of God?" 

Certainly not. Yet, here I am covered by His grace. An undeserved WRETCH, blind to my own depravity. 

Saved. Being sanctified. So blessed. 

And, here.... as I wait, dumbfounded and, a little nervous, but so so excited, I am just so thankful. Thankful that God would have it in His plan for little old me to go to Ireland, of ALL places. 


I REALLY CANNOT BELIEVE THIS IS HAPPENING! 

To my dear friends, beloved family, and fellow readers, 
thank you all so so much for your prayers, support, and encouragement. 

Goodbye, USA- Sweet Ireland, I will be with you for about 7 weeks. 
:D