Saturday, December 30, 2017

Learning True Joy: To Pray More Often, More Deeply

Holy,
Holy, 
HOLY 
Is the 
LORD GOD 
ALMIGHTY

Who was, 
Who is, 
Who is to come, 

ALL 
Praise, 
Honor, 
and GLORY 
be to HIM 
Forever 
and 
Ever! 
AMEN! 

I have been on my knees so many times this past month, begging the Lord for relief and to teach me to see and to feel His Presence and to know and believe the Truth, rather than my feelings. As I read the Word, I know it must be the Holy Spirit who directs me to how many times God commands us to rejoice in Him, to delight in Him, to know that He is God. It starts with understanding Who He is. 

When Jesus was teaching the masses how to pray, He started with the awe, the glory, the REVERENCE of GOD. It starts with knowing, seeing and delighting in WHO God is. 
Matt. 6:9-13, starting in vs. 9, "Pray then like this:

"Our Father in heaven, 
hallowed be Your Name!" 

Then, Jesus continues, reminding us that we are to ask for God's Will to be done! I listened to an incredible message from John Piper (if you want to listen to it here ) about how we are to beg the Lord to give us new hearts, that we will "delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desire of your heart." What is the deepest desire of our hearts? To know the One Who we were made for! To know and delight in our GOD and Creator! (Ps. 37:3-7) This is TRUE JOY, which leads to true peace. And peace guards our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus (Phil. 4:4-7).
Vs. 10:

"Your kingdom come, 
Your Will be done, 
on earth as it is in heaven."

Now, after praising the Lord, seeing and knowing His beauty and asking Him to give us hearts that desire His Will, then, we are to present our requests to God. So often, we only present our requests. Satan loves this. He wants us to be focused on ourselves and our needs, not on our Maker and a relationship with Him! (Another article from desiringgod.org here about praying) That's why Jesus directs us to pray in reverence and awe of God first, then asking for His Will!!! 
Vs. 11:

"Give us this day our daily bread," 

Then, we remember who we are and our deepest need: our sinful state, our need for a Savior and a pardon, and our need for reconciliation with our God and with His creation, others around us. But, we can only forgive in the overflow of the forgiveness that we have received ourselves from God because of Jesus' atonement for our sins. 
Vs. 12:

"and forgive us our debts, 
as we also have forgiven our debtors." 

Then, we ask for protection from temptation. Keep us SAFE, GOD! "For the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak!" Jesus tells us (He knows us so well!) in Matt. 26:41. We are to work out our faith with "fear and trembling!" Phil. 2:12, and to ask the Lord to save us from evil! We need HIM to help us! 
Vs. 13: 

"And lead us not into temptation, 
but deliver us from evil." 


Our treasure. Our lives. Our daily death. Our will. Our purpose... We no longer live for ourselves, as slaves of the flesh, but slaves of righteousness to Christ. He alone can help us, save us, and to Him be all glory forever and ever. 


"Charis. Grace. Eucharisteo. Thanksgiving. Chara. Joy... 
If eucharisteo had been the first dare, the first journey of discovery into a life of letting God love me and counting all those ways, could this be a dare for the next leg of the journey, the way leading higher up and deeper in, daring me to let all the not-enough there in my open hands- let it be broken into more than enough? A dare to let all my brokenness- be made into abundance. Break and give away. The broken way.
What if this were the safest embrace- the way of being wanted and held and found in the midst of falling apart? What did Jesus do? In His last hours, in His abandonment, Jesus doesn't look for comfort or try to shield Himself against the rejection; He breaks the temptation to self-protect- and gives the vulnerability of Himself. In the sharp edge of grief, Jesus doesn't look for something to fill the broken and alone places; He takes and gives thanks- and then does the most counter-cultural thing: He doesn't keep or hoard or hold on- but breaks and gives away. In the midst of intimate betrayal, He doesn't defend or drown Himself in addicting distractions, He breaks and is given- He gives His life. Because what else is life-giving? 
Out of the fullness of the grace that He has received, He thanks, and breaks, and gives away- and He makes a way for life-giving communion. A broken way." -Ann Voskamp from The Broken Way

It is all by Jesus and for Jesus. He made a way for us. He is the Way, the Truth and the Life. He saved us from our sins and we will receive His inheritance if we share in His suffering. 

"But, we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair, persecuted, but not forsake; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. So death is at work in us, but life in you. 
Since we have the same Spirit of faith according to what has been written, "I believed, and so I spoke" we also believe, and so we also speak, knowing that He Who raised the Lord Jesus will raise us also with Jesus and bring us with you into His Presence. For it is all for your sake, so that as grace extends to more and more people it may increase thanksgiving to the glory of God. 
So we DO NOT lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight in glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal." -2 Cor. 4:7-18 

This is one of my favorite passages. A reminder of WHO it is all about and is made possible by! A reminder that everything has a purpose- this pain has a purpose! The Glory of the Lord and that others may see and KNOW that it is God and not us. Praise His Glorious Name! 

"For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is names, that according to the riches of His glory, He may grant you to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith- that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. 
Now to Him Who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power (the Spirit of God!) at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen." -Eph. 3:14-21  

May the Lord grant for us to know that He may be known by us, that He may be glorified, that others may see and believe, profess and be saved by faith! He will SURELY do it! Praise the True Lord Jesus Christ. 




Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Rejoice always

Rejoice in the Lord always! 
And again, I say, "Rejoice!" 
Rejoice in the Lord always! 
And again, I say, "Rejoice!" 

I am such a striver. I won't go down without a fight. Or I will run the other way. It must be perfect- I must be perfect, but oh, oh... I know that it isn't possible and so I continue in the endless cycle or fighting or fleeing after what cannot be fixed. 

And, then, here come those hopeless feelings: defeat, failure, unworthy, not enough, too much. 

Just be held. Just be here. I did. I found you. You didn't find me- I found YOU. 

It breaks through and quiets me for a brief moment until I am washed again with the overwhelming worry and the craven fear that creeps in before I even know that it is drowning me again. 

I am with you always. My steadfast love endures forever. Jesus paid it all and His blood has washed your crimson stain white as snow. 

But... 

It's so very easy to doubt. To fear. To worry. To strive. To try to control. 

I am the LORD. I am holy. I did it. I can do it. I WILL do it. Trust me, child. I love you more than you know. I sent my Son to die for you, you know. My Spirit is with you and revealed that to you. 

I think half to myself, half to the Lord, But, my feelings are so very overwhelming and my heart condemns me... Are you even real? Are you even there? Will I always feel this way? 

Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in ALL your ways acknowledge HIM, and He will make straight your paths. My dear, sometimes trusting is just letting me hold you. Give me your heart. Cast all your cares on me, for I care for you. I will not permit my righteous to be removed. The sacrifices of the Lord are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O Lord, you will not despise. 

Praise the Lord. I feel pretty broken. Body, mind, soul and heart kind of broken. 

Rejoice in the Lord ALWAYS! I will say it again, "REJOICE!" 

Even now. Rejoice in ALL circumstances. Rejoice always. He doesn't say when you feel like it. But, at all times. 

I am not unable to sympathize with your pain and weaknesses: Jesus endured all and is interceding on your behalf. He loves you so- even in all the pain of the waiting in the garden, He endured the cross for the joy set before Him to honor and obey me. And in doing so, He ransomed you. You will have what He has. Eternal life and union with Me. All glory and honor and praise be to God forever and ever. Amen. 

His Word, not my feelings, are to be trusted. My feelings, yes, acknowledge them, even offer them up to the Lord, but do not trust them. Trust what is true, lovely, honorable- reflect on these things. Trust what is able to divide soul and spirit, joints and marrow, it judges. Trust what is infallible and from the inspiration and authority of God Himself. Trust what has become flesh in Jesus Christ. Trust the Word of God. 

Praise be to God, that He found me and saved me and won't rest until He renews my mind and captures my heart, sealing it for His courts above. Praise the Lord that I am His. Not because I deserve it, but because of Jesus Christ. 

Monday, December 25, 2017

Forgiveness and Love for those who believe

As I could not sleep, I saw and felt more clearly how damaging and destructive self-pity, resentment, bitterness and pride are- they make me their god and cut me off from others. But, more importantly, they make it impossible to forgive, trust and love, ripping the union with Christ, making it difficult to discern His Voice. They cripple in a self-made prison of fear, isolation and self-condemnation, forgetting the power of the gospel, making me forget my rightful place. 

Praise the LORD because He died for these things and is causing me to turn from them and to trust HIM! His steadfast love changes my heart of stone to a heart of flesh, making it come alive, healing it of the decay and death. That fear that was produced is cast out and replaced with fear of God and love for Him. There is no condemnation for those in Christ and there is freedom in His grace. 

Praise the Lord for the sweet little baby Jesus, who set aside His glory in heaven to become one of us and to atone for our sins. He is with us. He has risen! He reigns! Praise the Lord! All glory and honor and praise be to Him forever and ever, AMEN!